Separate

I awaken again disheveled

everything all askew.

including me all wrapped up

in these feelings of missing you.

I have heard those sounds again all night long.

the sounds of you calling out.

but now I know that it’s just me

calling out to you.

I mistook the things you said

the things I felt when I heard your words.

to be the same things that I was saying to you

that’s the problem sometimes with words.

tone and texture, are hard to discern

though I thought I heard your voice.

but I guess I heard what I wanted to hear

in every word you said.

so slowly I will unravel

untwist myself from this mess.

unwind, unfurl what has become unhinged

and tighten it all up again.

reattach the latches

that keep everything in place.

tighten the screws and turn the keys

and keep everything where it belongs.

in here safe from misconception

from the things I just can’t understand.

it’s ironic isn’t it, that I am the one

who got all of this so wrong.

with all that you know and have learned

you know that this is what I must do.

to find my way back to myself

and out of this place I now stand.

some of this is yours

and some of this is mine.

we made the mistake of mixing it all

together and letting it grow.

into something that had a life of its own

but wasn’t supposed to be.

but now that thing must be tended to

and slowly rocked back to sleep.

where it can lie quietly alone

where it is to remain.

where it can be at peace again

and won’t bother us anymore.

there will be strings and strings of words

that will form the bridge to me.

the things that will connect me again

to what right now is lost.

read all of those words one more time

and understand why this is.

how it happened, what went wrong

don’t make that same mistake again.

I know where I went

and where I have to go now.

I’m going to miss you for a little while

but I’ll see you once again.