Tuesday, January 29, 2013


If it's something you need to hear
say it to yourself.
If it's something you need to feel
listen deep within.
If it's something you need to know
you know, you already do.
If it's something you need to believe
it's already gotten you here.
This is the time of battles
the time of victory and defeat.
This is the time when it all comes down
to who you really are.
There is nothing truly evident
to make you believe in anything.
There is nothing but you in this moment
and you are standing alone.
Keep moving, believing, keep fighting
now when it is the hardest it's been.
Keep trying, even when failing
what choice do you have?
You will find yourself in there somewhere
in the battle as it ensues.
This is what you came here for
you are fighting for your life. 

Friday, January 11, 2013

1 in 25

The article said 1 in 25
4% left standing in the dark.
Lost without light to find their way
wandering upon a road alone.
Broken maybe, some, maybe not
but sad enough and worse they cannot see.
That moments pass and things will change again
so many times they won’t remember this.
Vision narrowed by silence
and the pain of being alone.
Whether real or self-imposed
it’s irrelevant.
It’s real in the moment it’s felt
and true in the moment it’s lived.
And the silence screams louder
than anything else ever will.
1 in 25 can’t see tomorrow
of the 4% how many of them will?
With 96 others taking all of our attention
those 4 will slip quietly through the cracks.
The cracks that have shaken their foundation
the broken pieces they can’t seem to fit.
Together again, the pieces form a puzzle
but connecting the dots does not appeal to them.
What do we have to do to hear them
to know which one will be 1 of the 4?
How do you see 1 in 25
when 96 others are currently loud and clear?
Listen to the silence and the pauses
listen for the things not being said.
Look beyond the shadows into darkness
and be amazed at what is shining brightly within.
 Clear a single path amongst the clutter
wipe away the dust with your bare hand.
Sit amongst the pieces that are scattered
and you will see them fit together once again.

*Written in response to an article on teen suicide statistics.* 
Shared at dversepoets.com

 Open Link Night ~ Week 79

Wednesday, January 2, 2013


I’ve never really seen myself as anything more than this

someone broken, in need of repair.

I’ve never really believed that I would have any more than this

alone and aching and wishing that I was someone else.

I thought that I could be all the things that I never was

someone who someone needed, someone who was strong.

I thought that I could overcome

because someone believed in me.

Whether or not you did or didn’t

wouldn’t have mattered anyway.

You were never going to see me

any differently than I saw myself.

It’s been a year and in that year

I’ve ridden the roller coaster to here.

I’ve closed off and shut down and can only see

my face in this funhouse mirror.

I can vividly recall of the times that I silently turned

and covered up my scars.

And you never came looking because you were too busy

nursing all of your own.

We were too broken people trying to fill

the spaces in those empty rooms.

We should have turned around

that first morning on the road.

When springtime in the city came

and we packed up all our things.

We forgot that the crucial thing to hold

was each other instead of ourselves.

We pushed and pushed each day and each year

until we couldn’t see each other anymore.

I wonder if you can see yourself now

no part of me looks the same.



Tuesday, January 1, 2013

The truth is...

The truth is I’m coming unraveled

the truth is I’m falling apart.

The truth is I’m spinning in circles

the truth is I’m back at the start.

The truth is it’s been a year

the truth is I’ve gained no ground.

The truth is I don’t know what to do now

the truth is I’m falling down.

The truth is it probably was all my fault

the truth is I died inside.

The truth is I couldn’t find my way

the truth is I was trying to hide.

The truth is I hid myself so well

the truth is even I couldn’t see me.

The truth is I never gave you a chance

the truth is I never again believed.

The truth is I can’t forget about you

the truth is there is nothing to say.

The truth is I’m trapped in this downward spiral

the truth is I can’t drink you away.

The truth is I just want to disappear

the truth is I don’t want anything anymore.

The truth is I just want to stop hurting inside

the truth is I can’t find the door.