There is something quietly
uneventful
about making the right choice.
Something anticlimactic
about deciding to let go.
It’s been a battle fought hard
and a battle slowly won.
But I believe today I have
taken a step
and will keep moving away from
here.
That day was a turning point
within me
six months almost to the day
that you left.
When that ring left my hand and
flew across the river
and sunk to the bottom I
quietly exhaled.
It will always be here now in
the place where I loved you
when I leave I don’t have to
carry it with me again.
You now have changed this place
for me forever
and it will never be the
magical place that it was.
Finally seeing your actions
loud and clear
the complete and total absence
of respect.
You swore to me I was the most
important thing in your life
words, empty words, the truth
would have hurt so much less.
Continuing to tell me that
you’re hurting
and mourning and grieving the
loss of us.
Confuses me more than any words
I’ve ever heard
do you dry your tears on her
pillow at night?
I don’t need any of this
anymore
I don’t need someone to treat
me like this.
To lie and hide things and make
me out for the fool
take your pretty words and give
them to her.
You can’t pull me back this
time, I’m finished
finished with letting you manipulate
my heart.
Finished with letting ambiguity
keep me hanging on
when I am clearly not the one
you want.
You made the choice I hope it
was worth the outcome
I hope that the end justified
the means.
You’ve lost something you will
never know again
because you didn’t treat it
with the care that it deserved.
You’ve never actually owned the
things you did
just blanket apologies for
choices that were wrong.
You might try saying the words
out loud some time
it might just be the first step
to assuaging some of that guilt.
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