Fear

There you are, I wondered where you’ve been

it’s been years since I have sensed your presence.

Years since I have woken with a start from my sleep

years since I have been afraid of the dark.

There is nothing worse than knowing you are there again

nothing worse than feeling you close behind.

Stalking me from the quiet corners and the silences

waiting for me to leave door ajar.

It’s usually from sleep that you draw your strength

building with a vengeance to tear me down.

Just when peace and calm have fallen down around me

you strike your blow with a force that shakes the room.

I wake with a start not knowing where I am

innocently forgetting what‘s been done.

Then suddenly it’s there and I am thrust into its arms

terrified and lying here alone.

It’s the fear of being utterly

 and solitarily left here on my own

It’s the fear of knowing that this is the life

that I have to carve out for myself.