the walls are feeling closer
pressing on me again.
the light outside the window
is causing my skin to burn.
I’m liking the dark much more these days
not hiding, just refuge found.
falling into restless sleep
and dreaming away my time.
I wake up on the couch now
day after day after day.
can’t take myself down that lonesome hall
I miss the comfort of my bed.
nothing is right, unsettled at best
the one true signal for change.
I’ve said it before and feel it again
I am sick and tired of this.
I want something static even just for awhile
long enough for me to catch my breath.
it seems I’ve been running endlessly now
I can’t seem to make any of it fit.
the pieces are jagged, sharp at the edge
I keep cutting my hands on them.
trying to put myself back together
I truly don’t know where to begin.
on a recent trip back in time
to the place I once called home.
I slept the sleep of an innocent child
for six nights in a row.
this hasn’t happened in years for me
I’m a ghost haunting my own nights.
holding candlelit vigils
waiting for some dreamt of return.
I don’t even know what I’ve lost now
I’ve felt undone for so long.
unhinged, unbalanced, swinging wildly
like a broken door in the wind.