Thursday, August 22, 2013

A Ride Cut Short





downtown

at sunset

on an unseasonably warm

summer’s night

perched high atop

the wheel

a rainbow of lights

illuminates
 
 
 
 
the clouds
are rather daunting
rolling in
at breakneck speed
shifting the feel
and the tone of the air
 
 

 
 
in distance
a flash~
a crack~
lightning strike
and thunder clap~
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
I think
this ride
is over
 
 
FOR D'VERSE POETS 
MTB 55 WORDS 
 







 

27 comments:

  1. oh i love to ride the ferris wheel - but so very dangerous in a thunder storm... such bad luck that it was over way too quickly... cool pics as well... we have one in basel at the autumn trade fair each year - on top of the münster hill - it's awesome....

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  2. A lovely lively ride for a 55, Andrea; enjoyed the ups & downs; thanks.

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  3. Well, I definitely would not want to be on a ferris wheel in a lightning storm!! I have been on that gigantic ferris wheel at Navy Pier, if that is the one you are talking of.

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  4. That is an adventurous ride. I love Ferris wheel.
    Interesting write.

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  5. eep...hopefully they got off before it struck...or the larger ride might be over....surely those things are grounded right?

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  6. This was quite a ride you took us in... scary indeed.

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  7. Great movement in the piece - taking the ride, seeing the color, feeling the thrill and the noise and then STOP! Wow! Good work!

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  8. Love where you went with this.

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  9. Successful atmosphere--Your background and photos energize your words and heighten the inherent fear factor associated with lightning and heights. Nice.

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  10. Oh, and they can only move so fast to get everyone off. That would be suspenseful at the top, waiting for your turn. Nice, Andrea.

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  11. Impressive rendering of a frightening experience!

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  12. Really well written. I'm not sure I'd handle that...long-standing fear of heights!

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  13. I heard the caravel music playing

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  14. ..familiar scene as our weather turns in August...I like your short story of a ferris wheel and a storm...a lot like life, huh?

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  15. Your choice of pictures---SUPERLATIVE---Your chosen words excellent. I've been there & it scared the #^%*+% outta me.

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  16. I am scared with that ending, very chilling ~ Yikes on those thunderstorms ~ Good one ~

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  17. You have just put words to one of my worst fears... getting killed when riding the ferris wheel. Yes, I truly, truly am terrified of even a single .. (once I rode a double and I panicked when at the top) So to me, these 55 words are horrifying.

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  18. Love that you illustrated your story. I surely would not want to be on a large metal wheel in the middle of a thunderstorm! Nicely captured.

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  19. How spectacular the view for your final ride though? Really enjoyed your 55 and the 'chill factor'

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  20. O! Such a short life! Such a dangerous ride.

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  21. ...ah, i hate it when my happiness are being interrupted... but then safety is the top most priority before every enjoyment... loved this Andrea... smiles... & oh, never tried a ferris wheel before... yay...

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  22. Strong writing, Andrea. Punctuating the story with the pictures added to the tension - nicely done.

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