enough

I can’t sleep

my heart races wildly

ticking off the moments

to its pounding beats

I can’t catch my breath

I am sitting still

but feel as if I am moving

faster than my feet could ever go

I cry randomly and often

in front of groups of people

or as I now lie here

so utterly alone

I miss every beautiful moment

that I ever spent with you

in the comfort of your gaze

in the warmth of your arms

I am broken now

beaten, exhausted and holding on

by a single thread

that is tethered to nothing

I am fragile and afraid

because in this moment

I realize how truly alone

I am

 you love me

I love you

but now I remember you once said

love just isn’t enough

I argued the point

so foolishly I held to my belief

that love would light our way

love is simply a foundation

the commitment to build

that love into a lifetime

is where the beauty lies

the hard work, the blood,

the sweat, the tears

and the joy as you watch

your labor become your life

us against the world

you and me

but for us there is only you

and there is only me

your path and your dream

is an open road

for too long

you were tethered in place

I found myself wanting

to be here building

forming the structure

that would frame our life

I want connection and a home

and a love within those walls

I thought we shared that dream

but I realize now that my voice

was the one narrating this tale

and that in your silence

I never heard you

I should have listened

to what the silence said

but I always got so lost

in the way you looked at me

I got lost in the way you held my hand

and the way you touched me

as if you just couldn’t believe

that I was real

but I am real and we were real

I just don’t think that you ever truly believed

that we could have had a life

that would have lasted forever